


Difficult

by Lori Lane (LoriLane)



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Bonding over trauma, Child Abuse, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-29
Updated: 2020-02-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:40:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22963300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoriLane/pseuds/Lori%20Lane
Summary: Michael Guerin is “difficult.” Alex knows all about being “difficult.”
Relationships: Michael Guerin & Alex Manes, Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Comments: 10
Kudos: 51





	Difficult

Michael Guerin is “difficult.” Alex knows all about being “difficult.”

He was difficult when he looked too long at Kyle Valenti at thirteen. He was difficult when he got his nose pierced at sixteen. He was difficult every Christmas when he talked back. Because apparently saying anything is talking back. And being silent is being sullen which isn’t in the Christmas spirit and definitely means he’s being “difficult.”

Michael thinks he’s not easy to love. Because he’s loud, and chaotic, and he gets into stupid bar fights and fucks women he doesn’t know. As a kid he believes he was disobedient, difficult, a little shithead.

It’s easier to believe the problem is you. After all, you’re the only constant in a parade of terrible foster homes. Twelve foster homes, and not one person loved Michael Guerin. He must be unlovable.

Alex copes by controlling his life. He has a schedule. He knows when he wakes up, when he goes to sleep, and what he eats for dinner. Every choice is carefully researched beforehand. No one makes choices for Alex Manes anymore. He’s his own man.

Michael copes by embracing the chaos. He lived in his truck for three years before he saved up money for the airstream. Nothing is guaranteed. Might as well say what you want, drink what you want, fuck it up as much as you want. It doesn’t matter.

He doesn’t matter.

Michael Guerin came into this world with a family and within three months he was alone. He figures he’ll be alone forever.

Alex Manes has a family. He’s a Manes Man. He has a “legacy.”

He doesn’t want it.

His family hates him. A family is supposed to be unconditional love, but his family was full of cold nights, bleeding backs, and an aching familiar loneliness that will never go away.

At seventeen, they met for one cosmic moment. Everything aligned. It was perfect.

And then Jesse Manes opened the door.

And Michael left with nothing to remember Alex by but a ruined hand.

Love isn’t easy. Alex is okay with difficult. He’s always been difficult. Michael and Alex can be difficult together.

Ten years. It takes ten years for things to fit. For things to stop being squares trying to be shoved into circular holes.

It’s not easy. But they make it work. Things can be simple if they try hard enough. If Michael stops using metaphors and Alex actually says what he’s feeling. Things can fit.  
  
Michael fits perfectly in the curve of Alex’s body as they sleep. Alex spends the night inhaling the scent of the conditioner Isobel bought and demands Michael uses.

Alex fits into the dinner time routine between the garlic bread and the lasagna. Michael makes it work. Quick kisses between dishes washed.

Two difficult boys make things simple just by deciding love is a verb. They’ll work on it every day for the reward of effortless kisses, and nightmare free nights. Michael Guerin is difficult to love, but Alex finds it simple.

**Author's Note:**

> I can be found on Tumblr[ @angsty-aliens](https://angsty-aliens.tumblr.com)


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